Relationships

I recently heard some disturbing news from one of my friends. She is the warmest, friendliest German that I have ever met. She reminds me of a butterfly, always full of energy, talking and smiling. She is a pleasure to be around. Then suddenly, two - three months back, she disappeared. None of her friends saw her any more on the roads, in restaurants or shops and she stopped turning up for our get-togethers. We didn't think much of it because in December many people went away for their vacations or visiting family. When her disappearance continued into January, I was puzzled and I am sure other friends were too, since we started asking each other if anyone has met her. 

One day, I saw her on the road and she smiled and waved and looked her usual cheery self. Since I was in a hurry to catch a train, I didn't stop. That evening, she sent us all a message that she and her husband have separated. She had deliberately avoided all of us as it was the most painful period of her life and she wanted to sort herself out before she met anyone. I was really shocked. I somehow could not picture this happy, cheerful woman, always full of energy, in this predicament. She has told us that she needs some more time and will meet us all in a month or so. Of course nobody asked her how exactly their marriage broke down although I suppose somebody will when they meet her again. Some of the more observant ones in the group seemed to know that something was wrong even before she messaged us.

I feel very sad for my friend and her lovely kids, but I am not very good with words or expressing my support in such crises. I hope the family finds happiness again. In the last couple of years, this is my third friend who is separating. Each of them belonged to a different group of friends and that means different nationalities, social background etc. I don't want to turn cynical about marriages and it is scary to think that not all marriages last a lifetime.