I recently read a friend's facebook post about how out of place she felt at a Pilates course that she had just joined. She introduced herself in German (she is American, but speaks fluent German) and tried to be friendly with everyone in the class, but soon after the introductions, all the other participants ignored her and started talking among themselves. She was extremely annoyed and resorted to fiddling with her iPhone to ease her discomfort.
The above scenario is unfortunately all too common in Germany. I admit to gross generalisation, but Germans are definitely not the friendliest or warmest people in the world. My friend is a white American with a German husband and speaks very good German. She even has German roots. Now add brown skin to the mix and the problem will be multiplied ten times. I cannot count the number of times I have been in a new group which consists mostly of Germans and they turn and talk among themselves the moment initial introductions are done. I have experienced this in different companies that I have worked for, any courses that I have done, at my kid's playschool and kindergarten - you name it. I am a person who loves to talk to other people and interact with them. I feel extremely awkward if the people around me ignore me. I have no problems in initiating a conversation and I almost always do, but sometimes it is frustrating here since you don't really get the response that you were hoping for.
Having said that, I have to say that I have a few German friends, many colleagues and acquaintances with whom I am extremely comfortable and can talk for any length of time. With some of them, it took a few months to get to that level and with some a few weeks. Once you manage to reach that comfort level, Germans are like any other people - they come in all shades. But the initial reluctance to open up seems to be very widespread and just about every immigrant faces it at some point or other.
The above scenario is unfortunately all too common in Germany. I admit to gross generalisation, but Germans are definitely not the friendliest or warmest people in the world. My friend is a white American with a German husband and speaks very good German. She even has German roots. Now add brown skin to the mix and the problem will be multiplied ten times. I cannot count the number of times I have been in a new group which consists mostly of Germans and they turn and talk among themselves the moment initial introductions are done. I have experienced this in different companies that I have worked for, any courses that I have done, at my kid's playschool and kindergarten - you name it. I am a person who loves to talk to other people and interact with them. I feel extremely awkward if the people around me ignore me. I have no problems in initiating a conversation and I almost always do, but sometimes it is frustrating here since you don't really get the response that you were hoping for.
Having said that, I have to say that I have a few German friends, many colleagues and acquaintances with whom I am extremely comfortable and can talk for any length of time. With some of them, it took a few months to get to that level and with some a few weeks. Once you manage to reach that comfort level, Germans are like any other people - they come in all shades. But the initial reluctance to open up seems to be very widespread and just about every immigrant faces it at some point or other.
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